Please help, having trouble with a decision.?

So recently I lost the love of my life (long story) and I thought about "reinventing" myself. I cut and dyed my hair, lost 15 lbs and somewhat toned my body. I even went so far as to change my wardrobe. I wear short dresses, sexy tops, tighter jeans, etc. But now I have seriously considered breast implants. I want to jump to an F possibly a G(currently a DD). Ive done a lot of research but I still havent made a decision. I want to go big but there is a chance the surgeon will not be able to make them look natural like smaller implants. I really want to show off my new look, but I cant until I decide. What should i do?